My mom had a heart attack last Sunday. She had stents put in and had angioplasty. I was insanely worried about her and while she was having the procedure done I was in the cath lab waiting room, listening to Justin Bieber, and drinking 3 cups of coffee. I was shaking when I took my first sip. I was going to wait in her room while the procedure was done, but a nurse said for me to go down and see mom before. I was planning on reading the easy way to stop smoking book. I had decided earlier in the year that this was my year to quit smoking. A lot of things fell into place and watching mom go through this again, after only 5 years, I knew I had to quit smoking. Since Monday I haven't smoked. I was the heaviest smoker that I know and stopping was easier than I thought it was going to be. I was so worried on thanksgiving when my mom went back into the hospital and had to get angioplasty again. It was an insanely hectic week and I am happy mom is back at home and I feel better about it as well. I am going to try and help mom stay away from smoking and try and help her figure out a better diet for her so that it can help with her health issues. She is in denial about a lot of stuff and eating is one of them. Her blood sugar was high almost the while time they were checking it. I don't want to lose my mom any earlier then I have to.
Barnes & Noble had lowered the price of the black and white nook from $139 to $99, and on black Friday it was $79. I had been saving up money for it and I sold my bag of pot since I stopped smoking that as well and I paid for mine with gift cards, cash, and a credit card. I bought Graveminder and got about 50 pages into it.
I fucked up my schedule again and right now it is 4:30am and I'm still up. I was reading in the tub and people are starting to get up and I am going to bed. I dont want to stay on that schedule anymore so I am going to try and go to sleep early when I get up today so that I can try to get back into a routine.
Off to bed I go. :( still makes me a little sad at times that I am not a night owl anymore. Oh well.
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The insanity of my life and what I go through
About Me
- Crayzie Amy
- Hello there. My name is Amy. I am 28 years old. I have bipolar disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, and I am fucking confused in god damn love. I was hospitalized at least 4 times for depression and suicidal idiation and 1 attempt. (that I came very close to succeeding) I hope to one day soon write a book, possibly a memoir about what I have been through and I hope that in doing so I am able to help or change one life. Oh, and by the way, I am one weird mother fucker :)
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