Yay

We have already said that we wanted to marry each other and she just told me that when we went to the Renaissance Festival, she was going to ask me to be her wife. *sigh* god do I love that woman.

Do I ever write about anything happy?

I am bummed. I had a dream that totally confused me. People in it that I haven't seen in years and part of it was utter beauty. There was a back story about the people in the dream not appreciating their families. This girl I went to school with had a grandfather and she was ignoring him and he just wanted to tell his story. somehow he created a firework that arced into like a rainbow, and their were amazing colors and somehow in this beauty he had pieces that he wanted her to see about his life...and somehow this ended in me trying to buy a prescription in a seedy part of town and the pharmacists and assistants were these hot chicks and all they were trying to do was sell the drugs to me. I had no idea what to ask for and even though I was in a dream of course I didn't have money there either. Then I woke up...? I went to Renaissance Festival with Bex and it was a lot of fun. I will talk about it later, it just sucks right now because I'm sad because they say I might not be eligible for the discount for the prescriptions that I'm getting right now. What am I going to do? I'm on the verge of tears but that could be from the bleeding part. I'm listening to The Bawdy Boys trying to feel better, but I just feel like shit. I can listen to em because I bought both of their CDs this year. I think I'm just gonna watch tv. Peace Out Blog.

hoping for happiness

Meeting Bex tomorrow morning at my house. Why do you think I'm up? Ambien hasn't kicked in. On a night like this I really really need sleep so I hope it works soon.

<3 Mayne

Fuck me

Out of the hospital not even a week and I'm already frustrated enough to cry and this fuxking house will be the death of me. It's so dirty and everyone is fucking lazy and no one cleans. I hate my life and I hate this house. Will someone save me? Please?